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8 Fun and Easy Ways
to Love Eating, Lose Weight, and Stop Being
a Slave to Food!
by Connie de Veer, MFA, CPCC
What happened? It was all so clear to me
a month ago --- I was sure I could be satisfied
at 9 pm with a half an apple and my last,
preciously guarded bread exchange, patiently
watching the poundage drop off at a sensible
1.5 pounds a week, eyes on the target, firm
of resolve; clear of mind. Then, late one
afternoon, that little inner voice says
“I WANT COOKIES!... No, I mean I REALLY
want cookies. I’m not hungry, I just
want cookies...and I want them NOW!!!
That firm resolve that was so clear and
present yesterday is nowhere to be found.
I can’t seem to recall what I thought
was so darned important that I had to deny
myself that simplest of pleasures --- cookies
and milk. I look in the mirror and say to
myself, “for a middle-aged woman you’re
not so bad. Besides, why are you trying
to be a svelte sex-goddess at your age,
anyway? You should be secure enough that
you can accept yourself, no matter what
size you are.” (blah-blah-blah!)
Can you relate? This scenario has played
itself out in my life more times than I
care to recall. But recently, I finally
had enough, and used the skills I use to
coach other people to success, to jump start
my own weight loss plan and re-boot my resolve.
And it worked! Now I want to spread the
news! Here are the coaching techniques I
used to get off the diet merry-go-round
and lose weight. And you can do it, too!
1. Envision your goal If you’re vague
about where you’re heading and why
you want it, you won’t get there! So,
write out (or, if you hate to journal, speak
it into a tape recorder, or speak it to
a friend who’ll write it down for you),
a beautiful, blissful, perfect, 100% satisfaction,
no limits, no negative self-talk picture
of what you want to achieve in your eating
habits. Be as specific as possible, and
use as many sensory details as you can come
up with. IMPORTANT NOTE: Make this fun!!
When you have a clear idea of what you want,
the how-you-get-there piece gets easier
and clearer. If your resolve starts to wane
throughout your journey, take this out and
read it again.
Complete the following statements to stimulate
your thinking:
• I want to feel ________
• I see myself __________
• I am “having”…”being”…”doing”…____________
2. Food Association Journal Set aside about
a half an hour for this. Take inventory
of all the associations you have with food.
Sit down and write it all out. The good,
the bad, and the ugly! Let your unconscious
mind and your imagination go nuts with this
one. Draw pictures even, if you want to!
But get down on paper, every attitude, belief,
opinion, love, and hate that shows up when
you think about or have anything to do with
food.
Example: “Food is Mom! The smell of
meatloaf, corn, and baked potatoes when
I came in from playing as a kid.” or
“Food is bad --- It tempts me at every
turn and I have no control over it!”
3. Values Assessment Take a look at your
Food Association Journal and from it, pull
out as many things that you value, deem
really important, must have, and love about
food. Write them down. (Bear in mind that
when coaches refer to values, we don’t
mean what you think you should think is
important, or what someone else thinks is
valuable. Values in this context refer to
those things that aren’t either “right”
or “wrong.” Like emotions, they
just “are.”)
For example:
fresh/colorful/vibrant/nourishing celebratory/social/seasonal
rituals/family
How will you honor those values on your
healthy eating plan? (So you ENJOY this
journey, and don’t feel deprived or
“punished!”)
4. Start – and stick with – a
food journal Create a plan for what you’re
going to eat, and then write down everything
you do eat, even when it deviates from the
straight and narrow path. WRITE IT ALL DOWN!
Awareness of a habit is MOST of the solution.
And you might be surprised when you tally
up whatever units you’re counting (calories,
fat grams, etc.) It may be less than you
think, and then you’ll be less likely
to throw the towel in on your whole goal.
5. Craving Antidotes Make a list of at
least 10 antidotes you can call forth when
you’re hit with a food craving.
Things like:
• re-read your vision
• a picture (from a magazine, drawing,
photo, etc.) that captures the feeling and
look of what you want to achieve. (Mine
is a woman, about my age and coloring, in
a cool turquoise swimsuit, enjoying the
beach!)
• a mantra, or affirmation that calls
forth your inner strength and resources.
• activities you can choose instead
of eating: For example, a hot bubble bath,
an invigorating walk, call a friend, read
a juicy novel…
6. Get back in your body! That’s right.
We often disassociate from our bodies by
turning our attention to analyzing, judging,
planning, or otherwise medicating (with
food, drugs, alcohol, and other repetitive
thoughts and behaviors) in an attempt to
avoid being present in the everyday struggles
of life. The body is an undeniable reminder
of where we’ve been and where we’re
headed! It’s our bodies that show the
effects of time, stress, and the choices
we’ve made in a visible and concrete
way. So, crafty, adaptable animals that
we are, we’ve learned to escape by
“going into our heads,” so to
speak. Well, now it’s time to call
yourself back home to your body!
Set aside some quiet time to be alone and
undistracted. Check in with your body. Notice
what it feels like to inhabit this body.
Ask yourself the following questions:
•Where does my energy feel sluggish,
or stuck? Be specific. Your body knows,
if you give it a chance to “speak.”
•What am I hungry for (other than
food --- like love, appreciation, justice,
etc.), and how will I choose to get it?
• What food does my body want/need
right now? And what choice will I make?
• How do I want to feel, in my body?
Be as specific as possible. For example,
“I want to feel light in my knees,
and free and unencumbered in my lower abdomen.”
7. Expect obstacles and relapses now and
then. I promise you, they will happen. But
get the big picture – one little slip
up (or even two or three...) does not mean
your goal is doomed. Weight fluctuates.
Period. Whether you’re trying to lose
or gain, your mostly fluid body will ebb
and flow. You are not a victim of your humanity!
You can choose whether to stay stuck, or
get back on track.
8. Take the scenic route I don’t know
about you, but for me, I wanted to change
my eating habits for life, and I certainly
didn’t want to spend my life feeling
deprived!! So I decided to consciously choose
what I call, “Pauses on the scenic
route,” --- You know, like when you
decide to take longer to get to the Grand
Canyon so you can stop periodically and
really soak in the scenery? I decided to
give myself permission to deviate from my
eating plan now and then. My only rules
were:
• Enjoy every delectable morsel!
• Make it REALLY good quality and
something I really love and want!
• Get right back on the program after
I enjoy the “Scenic Lookout”
• No bingeing
This also means I didn’t lose the
classic 1.5 – 2 pounds a week. So what!
It means that I am in control, at choice,
and am not a slave to my (former!) addiction
to food. You can be in control and at choice,
too!
Connie de Veer, MFA, CPCC may be contacted
at http://www.cdvcoaching.com
Email cdvcoaching1@aol.com.
Connie de Veer, MFA, CPCC, is a Certified
Professional Coach and owner of CdV Coaching-for
Breakthrough Performance. She is the author
and developer of “Pull the Plug on
Panic: Speak With Confidence” e-book,
workshop, and Performance Coaching Program.
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